The Arrival Fallacy
Last week was a huge deadline for me.
Finally, after months of work, we launched a new workshop. The Anti-Procrastination Playbook. It’s taken so much of my bandwidth to push this thing across the finish line that I’m finally able to step back and take a breath.
…except I don’t.
It's The Arrival Fallacy at work– the misconception that achieving a particular goal will bring lasting happiness and fulfillment.
I’m so caught up in getting to this end that I’ve sacrificed my wellbeing in the present, thinking: “once this is out of the way I’ll finally have time to exercise/sleep more/eat better.” But when I look back at the last 3 years, it’s full of false deadlines. “When we finally move…” “when we get a nanny…” “Once the retreat is over…” “Once the kids are in school…”
We all do it. So how do we deal with it?
The Arrival Fallacy forces us to live in the future.
We’re giving up taking care of ourselves, or finding ways to be happy NOW because we (wrongly) believe that once this goal is met, we’ll have time and satisfaction of having completed this thing that has taken over our lives.
The best thing we can do to remedy this trap is to make room now. Today. What is going to help make us feel a little better? Make ourselves a little happier? Relieve a little stress?
Rest, breaks, and energizing activities should be non-negotiables in your days and weeks. You can consider them flexible, so that on lighter weeks you’re going to lunch with a friend on Friday or getting a full hour of exercise every day. And then when you’re busy, doing a 15 minute daily exercise and rescheduling social plans.
Your life doesn’t just magically fix itself when you check off the to-do and cross the finish line.
Here’s an analogy to close this out. Our life is best seen not a race or a journey– but instead, life is a house.
Take care of it while you’re there.
It’s the only one you have.
Make it nice to be in.
It will never be the perfect time to fix it up. But when you can squeeze in a clean, do it. When you have some bandwidth, get those pipes looked at.
Keeping it in good shape is way easier and cheaper than trying to rebuild it once it collapses.
Make other people want to be a part of it, visit it, and share it.
Caveday is a company aimed at improving your relationship to work. We write regular posts on Medium and send out monthly newsletters with productivity tips, life hacks, and recommendations. Sign up for the mailing list here.
Jake Kahana is a cofounder of Caveday. Sign up for his personal emails, called “The Email Refrigerator” here.